I stay crushing on thin air. ;]

It's almost that time of the year where new beginnings are blossoming. People are in hopes to have a different outcome and a turn around in life. It's never that easy... But one year... It'll come... :) Just gotta keep your hopes up...

Gosh... It's been awhile since I last saw your face... Time sure does fly... I still preferred you out of my life... It was more simple that way. I feel like you bring drama and unnecessary feelings to the table. I just don't have the energy I use to, to put up with this BS... ;X I've grown out of it... I guess I'll continue to avoid you at all cost. It's for the best. We separated for a reason and avoided you like the plague... That should have been an obvious sign that I want nothing to do with you... I guess some people are just really dense in their head that they just don't want to accept the fact of the matter... =.=" Drives me bonkers... Life is so complicated... It gets even more complex when a relationship is thrown into the mix... One minute you can't live without that person. The very next moment, you're sick and tired of them and you want a way out... How can someone's feeling change so drastically...? :\ It's never a happy ending either... Nor is it what you expected it to be... People can't really remain that friendship that they talked about in the beginning before they became a couple... It's always the complete opposite. ;X You both swear that no matter what happened in the relationship in the end, they'll always be friends. That's never the case. One person always decides to back out of the deal and want nothing to do with the other. It's quite sad actually... I thought people can be adults about these things... After all, we are one, aren't we? Sometimes it's hard to grasp the thought of losing someone. Someone that was once dear to you. Now they're just another shadow in the past that you don't want to be reminded of cause it'll just bring tears to your eyes. I hate sad endings... Endings that doesn't go anywhere... Why must there be an ending!? Can't things just "magically" always work out? If only... Right? One can only be optimistic. :) But for how long? :\

I'm sorry for everything... :[[ I hope one day we'll talk and become friends again, like we once were... So many unanswered questions...

I'm all cried out over you. Wow... So it's been a little over a year since I last updated... Let's see what's different since my last post. Well, for one, I'm another year older, hopefully wiser too... :3 Me and him Yao are no longer an item. Maybe it was for the best? >.> It happened fairly quick. There's really not much to say about what happened... Cause quite frankly I'm still a little baffled about what happened. None the less, I'm over it, there's no point in stressing it because it already happened. Things happen for a reason. :] On the brighter note to all of that mess, I do have someone dear to me. (: Despite our differences, we manage to work things out like any other couple. "It takes 2 to tango." He Ryan makes me smile. <3 We got our moments where things just isn't right. When things seem to fall apart, we always find a way back to each other. :]] As many may know, I'm a hothead and tend to be fairly stubborn when I want to be. ;X But he forgives and forgets because nothing is that big of a deal to let it linger in our system for so long. I'm really thankful to have found someone as kind and loving as him. <3 After all, not everyone has that special someone. :) Anyway, enough of this mushy gushy stuff. xP Moving along... Hm... OH! Warren is graduating this spring. YAY! :D I'm so proud of him and am a damn proud sister to have a brainiac of a brother. :3 He's growing up so fast. It actually brings tears to my eyes. One minute we're kids doing stupid kiddy things and the next, he's all grown up. :) This is kind of abrupt but I think I'm all typed out for the most part. xD Maybe I'll get back to this another time but for now, I have to say my farewells. Hopefully I'll post a little more frequent. We'll see. :] Until my next update, ciao. ;]

Life is too short to dwell on the past, we all should hold our heads up high and look forward to what the future has to offer because when life is over, there's no do overs... Another year older, another year wiser. Time sure does fly fast when you're enjoying life. The past year flew before my eyes. Although I feel like I haven't done much it still went by quick.

Lets have a quick recap of the year that just passed. So... Hmm... I'm actually not quite sure of what I've done that is worth mentioning. But one thing that I'm certain of and proud of is that I'm still in school and doing quite well. (: I'm in my second year and second semester. I guess being in school keeps me busy and allows time to just fly when you're being preoccupied. Definitely not a bad thing, I'm getting my learn on! ;] Even with that said, I'm uncertain of my career. I don't know where I want to be 5 years from now. I was so set with my major but now that I've taken some classes of that subject, I'm not sure if I want to be headed in that direction anymore. :\ Yeah, it's a good choice of career but do I see myself doing that day in and day out? That is a question that I ponder... I better decide quick because before I know it, it'll be summer vacay.

Work. Nothing much to say about that matter. Still working at that horrible place. Dx But it's no one's fault but mine, I'm not trying hard enough to get myself out. I shall try harder this year to find a new and enjoyable job. Let this year be the year where things happen! (:

Wow... We've been together for over 2 years now. It has been nothing but happiness with you. (: Yeah, we get into our little arguments here and there but what couple in this world doesn't? With each passing day, our bond of love grows stronger and stronger. There are no regrets. I'm thankful to have you Yao in my life. Life is a learning experience but he makes it worthwhile.

Then there's the baby brother. Every day with him is shits&giggles. I can't imagine where I'd be right now if he wasn't in my life to get me through all the bullshit. I'm grateful to have him. I can't imagine a life without that Fatty. xD LOL. Who would I have to rag on just because I can? He's the only person I can count on to get retarded with. LOL. We got no shame cause we some cool kids. :]

All in all, live life to the fullest. Never have any regrets because tomorrow is not guaranteed. I can't stress how stupid people are... I wish they would just learn... People need to stop being so self absorbed and ignorant. I'm so sick of all the bullshit and I'm most definitely tired of sugar coating everything. I'm beyond exhausted... On top of all the stupidity, I'm stressed with school... It's not fair that I'm trying to juggle so much without any help from them... Yet I have to pick up all the pieces and try to mend them together again... It's not my responsibility at all. Fuck off! I can only do so much... It's so draining...

I want need some peace...

Any down time would be good...

*Sigh* I don't want to complain but I can't help it because people just know how to make me angry... People are so damn lazy... How do you plan to get anywhere with that type of attitude? I hate leeches! If you don't give a crap, say so but don't go dragging the rest of us down with you...

I HATE group work! D:< Nothing ever gets done because people are assholes. Plain and simple. Every morning I wake up to the sound of my mom's voice. It's not because she's sweetly calling for me or talking to a dear friend but she's screaming her head off at her boyfriend... It really doesn't matter what time of the day, if she's on the phone with him, hell will break loose... Why is she doing this? Simply put, he's a scumbag. Okay, yeah, they've been together for more than half of my lifetime but once a crap shit, always will be... Look at how many years passed and he's still an asshole... I wish she'd understand and move on. I hate when she tells me that I don't understand. The only thing I don't understand is why does she insist on dealing with his shit. Fuck him and move on. He's a dirtbag, no need to dwell on it. It saddens me to see this nonsense going on. Why doesn't she understand it's unhealthy, not only for her but for us... She's so blinded with stupid stuff that she doesn't know she's hurting the people around her...

WAKE UP!
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